He cries for you when you constantly cut yourself with old knives of broken memories. He hurts for you when you go back to your drug of choice again and again seeking solace. He is dying to see you free.
“I believe that there is one story in the world, and only one. . . . Humans are caught—in their lives, in their thoughts, in their hungers and ambitions, in their avarice and cruelty, and in their kindness and generosity too—in a net of good and evil. . . . There is no other story. A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have left only the hard, clean questions: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well—or ill?”-John Steinbeck
I would much rather hurt among the living than be at peace among the dead.
I can’t produce beauty without ingesting it first, there is nothing new under the sun; or to steal a physics metaphor, (Creative) energy can be neither lcreated or destroyed. I am either a channel or a charlatan.
A God who doesn’t love is not a boon to us, He would be our total annihilation! But Jesus, claimed to be God, and then loved us in a way no one had seen before. He showed us that God is love and opened a channel to Him as our Daddy (Abba) that all Hell, including our sin, could never close.
I can’t shake the truth of who I have been and the old desires still dwell deeply within, yet I am called to be something new, a new creation, living out a call that God has given me that puts me directly in danger of catastrophic, spiritual failure. How do we live there? Grace.