So, I’ve been ill, busy, and a little down. My social energy is kinda bad. The prospect of watching the Longhorns play this Sunday night without Dad kinda slid up into my subconscious bypassing the part of me that has been trying to face every little grief thing as it comes up. Having let out whats happening in my head, I now have more energy and a ton of catch up work to do, lol. Grief is like a drug addiction, when you come back from your low, life has stacked up on you. They should add ‘catch-up’ to the grief cycle. Or maybe ketchup. That would be tastier. Anyhoo, I know folks are still waiting for me to get back to normal. Doing my best, I don’t know what the timeline is for these things. Apparently it’s longer than a year to 18 months.
On another note, glad to have responsibilities. If I wasn’t faced with deadlines and people that counted on me for certain things, I think I might have crawled into a hole. Y’all pray for my family and especially for Karin. I read a lot about how great everyone’s spouse is on social media and I’m just as arrogant about my awesome wife. You need to know, however, that you don’t really understand how awesome your spouse is until they have to hold your hand through troubled times. It’s then, putting up with your most profound weaknesses that you learn the truth about most people in your life and your spouse above all. She has been my peace, an instrument of God, and only complained one time. LOL. Ready for me to get back to normal. Soon, baby, I can feel the wind changing.
Anyway, and I will try to say this in the least offensive way possible. God is good. I know people who get through some horrendous things ‘without God.’ I couldn’t do it. He’s my Rock. Here’s the thing, for those of you who don’t carry my faith: When we survive something hard because of the support of friends, the love of family, the resilience of the human spirit, it’s still because of God. If there is no objective truth or absolute moral law then human dignity, love, friendship all of these things we hold dear become social constructs, they don’t exist, except to make us feel better. When people behave selflessly on our behalf, that’s a sign of human dignity, which is in itself a sign of God and objective, absolute truth. The person who loves unconditionally, or allows themselves to be loved with that level of grace, has faith, whether they are aware of it or not. They have put feet on the path that ultimately leads to Jesus.